Don't Ask, Don't Tell 'Cause it's None of My Business

OK ... the Senate has gone and done it, and perhaps we'll all survive. But kindly allow me to weigh in on the matter, and to opine on why doing away with Don't Ask Don't Tell is not such a great idea after all.

To all my liberal friends, please do me the dual courtesies of believing that I'm a good person at heart, willing to listen to a good argument, and that I have what I believe are the best interests of our Armed Forces at heart.

Settle in... this is gonna' take a moment.

We in the Service (notice my use of that word ... we almost never say we're in "the Military"...) live in each other's hip pockets. When we enlist or join, we voluntarily sign away some of our constitutional rights. The right to privacy, the right to peaceably assemble and petittion for redress of grievances, the right to a trial by a jury of our peers, freedom of speech, all become parts of our civilian pasts when we join up. We know this going in and are OK with it, mostly, because we believe our civilian leaders won't use and abuse us ... and we believe(d) that MOST of them have shared our uniformed lot in life once or twice in their non-political pasts.

OK ... that last one has already gone by the boards. A vanishingly tiny percentage of our political leaders have ever worn their country's uniform, probably have NEVER slept in a barracks or berthing compartment aboard ship, and have NO idea what our lives are like. And yet they loudly proclaim that they know what is best for uniformed service members.

Let's take that last idea and explore it, shall we?

On some ships and in some posts, we live in open-bay compartments, crammed cheek-by-jowl ... 50 men to a room. We live together, we eat together, we shower together. We have utterly surrendered any expectations of privacy in government quarters. (Our lockers can be opened by any officer on duty who feels an inspection is in order.) Some barracks don't even have doors on the toilets! The very LAST private facet of our lives that we don't surrender is our sexual identity.

Yet we find ways to make this fishbowl existence work. We don't look, and we hope no one is looking back.

Ever been to Japan? It may surprise some to know that in such a conservative country, they nevertheless practice communal bathing. They make it work, I am told, by drawing a mental curtain of privacy about themselves and telling themselves, "It's OK ... no one is looking." Life in a barracks MUST of necessity be like that! It only works when you can tell yourself "No one is looking."

Repealing D.A.D.T. tears that mental curtain asunder.

Next, to those who say America's Armed Forces must reflect American Society, I agree ... BUT, I remind you that the American military is NOT some sort of social laboratory! We exist outside of society's norms and outside of part of the constitutional rights you all take for granted. (Right to trial by a jury of your peers? HAH! Ever look at the composition of a Court Martial? Those colonels and generals sitting in judgement are hardly the peers of the corporals and sergeants in the dock!) We fight when we must (mostly) for each other! Anything that in any way hinders or curtails that unit cohesion must also curtail that unit's fighting ability.

Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, D.A.N.T. is a working principle! At no time has our national ability to wage war ever been hindered by this! (I don't doubt that we've lost some good soldiers, sailors, airmen and Marines due to this over the years, but our national warfighting ability has remained solid.)

And to my gay friends in uniform, whose identities I never knew, I honor your service. But can't you see that the moment you stand up and say, "Look at me! I'm gay. I serve in uniform and it's OK" you commit the cardinal (military) sin of taking everyone's eyes OFF the unit and the mission and calling attention to yourself? THAT VERY ACT CURTAILS UNIT COHESION!

I remember when women were first being recruited into the Navy in once-male career fields, such as aviation electronics and engine mechanics. I remember walking around my squadron's hangar, seeing all the Playboy and Penthouse centerfolds hanging on office and maintenance bay walls, and wondering, "Hmmm, now that women are here, aren't we all going to have to keep our sex lives more private?"

And so it came to pass. Sexuality (rightly) has no place in a hangar, on a ship, in a squad bay or in any sort of military environment anymore.

Keeping your sexuality -- straight or gay -- to yourself is just good manners in a crowded barracks ... NOT the same as "living a lie."

So, just as my sexuality is none of your business, yours is none of mine. Don't ask ... Don't tell.

Things I learned today while firing my 1943 Mosin Nagant for the first time

Today was the day I set aside for me and my Mosin Nagant. After hours of painstakingly cleaning and restoring this WWII firearm, I took it out to the rifle range for the first time. As an advocate of lifelong-learning, I can report that the rifle range at Eagle, Wisconsin, became a learning lab for life lessons in short order.

To wit:

1. Take your time, 'cause you're going to need it -- Rapid fire on a bolt-action Mosin Nagant approaches the speed of muzzle-loading musketry. With my AR-15, I can empty a 30-round clip in a matter of seconds. With the balky action of the MG, I average two rounds a minute.

2. Bring heavy tackle in your range box -- The bolt action is renowned for actually tightening up as you shoot, instead of the other way 'round. By the end of my range time, despite pounding several boxes of ammo downrange, I was having to pound on the bolt lever with my fist to cycle the next round. (I now have a lever-shaped bruise on my right fist). Next time, I'm going to use my truck's bumper jack.

3. Moose? Mule? Forget it! -- The Mosin Nagant is legendary for having a recoil like a (insert your angry wildlife of choice here.) Not even close. Even though I was prepared for it, the recoil physically knocked me back at the firing bench every time. Mule? Feh! Moose? Hah! This rifle kicks like a pissed-off pickup truck, and I loved every minute of it!

4. Perspective plays funny tricks on MG shooters -- I actually had the good fortune to stand inside Turret #2 on the Battleship Wisconsin when she fired her 16-inch, 66-foot-long cannons in a ferocious broadside barrage. I recall the dumpster-sized breach of the gun looking like a runaway semi-truck as the massive recoil sent it hurtling towards me. Today, with the steel bolt of the Mosin Nagant only inches from my eye, it had much the same look and feel (and sound levels)

5. Always check your pockets first -- When firing this rifle, always, ALWAYS go through your shirt pockets first. I didn't and now am sporting a bruise on my right shoulder in the shape of a Sensa all-aluminum ballpoint pen. A glance at the photo above will show me cradling, not only the Mosin Nagant, but also a wounded shoulder. After a full day at the range, your chiropractor is your new best friend.

6. The Mosin Nagant aims high ... real high -- The rear sights are calibrated out to 1,000 meters, and legend has it the bullet will actually travel that far and hit what you aim at. But the ungodly amount of power this round has cause it to aim somewhat high on a mere 100-yard rifle range. Thus this rifle would make a handy anti-aircraft gun -- if you could just figure out a way to get the aircraft to hold still long enough for you to cycle the bolt lever.

7. Zombies? Schmombies! -- Commonly held wisdom says that, when the zombie apocalypse comes, and the walking dead are shouldering the living aside for the best seats on the bus, we (the armed living, that is) should aim for their heads to put them down. Hah! All I have to do with my Mosin Nagant is aim for the center of a reasonably-sized group of zombies, and the bullet's shockwave will knock 'em all down like ninepins.

8. What's in a name(s)? -- My ancient rifle-shaped relic generated much good-natured talk out on the rifle range today. It's amazing how creative people can become when trying to pronounce a name that's half-Russian, half-Belgian. "MOH-sin naa-GANT," or "MOY-zeen no-GAUNT," or (perhaps attempting to attach some sort of Hebrew heritage to my rifle,) "MOH-ses NEW-gun" were just a few of the attempts. For the last time, it's pronounced "

MOH-zeen NAH-gone," or even, "This-goddam-sawed-off-cross-between-a-howitzer-and-a-railroad-tie."

9. Maybe the safest place to be is right in front of the targets -- After watching my fellow shooters, I reasoned that Wisconsin's nine-day Deer Hunting Season, which opens in a few days, is a great time to stay out of the woods. In short order, I witnessed: a nearby shooter staring down the barrel of his (loaded) rifle to see if there was a bullet in the chamber; a fellow shooter startled by his rifle's recoil, get knocked back and fire a quick second round through the roof of the range; and a third shooter cursing and swearing at his rifle (which was chambered in Winchester .30-30,) because it refused to chamber a round. A quick examination showed that he was attempting to load a .30-06 shell into the chamber. "Well, THAT wouldn't have ended well," muttered the range safety officer, walking away and shaking his head.

I quite agree.

"Peace is that brief glorious moment in history when everybody stands around reloading".

Veterans Day is here again, and a glance on the 'Net or in your local newspaper will reveal that most people think: (A) Memorial Day is a time to plan a picnic or barbecue, and (B) Veterans Day is a time for a sale at your local retail outlet.

I guess I'm sort of OK with that. Sort of.

To my fellow citizens, speaking as someone who is a veteran and who also happens to work in a retail outlet, I say, "Thank you for your ecomonic stimulus by shopping."

But I hasten to remind you also, take a look at your parents and grandparents and -- especially if they fought in WWII, Korea or Vietnam -- take a moment and thank them for their service to a country which all-too-often breaks its promises to military people. Then ask your parents and grandparents to share some military stories with you. (Don't expect too many combat stories. That's something not often shared.)

But there's a lot to talk about with them.

I hear that WWII veterans are leaving us at the rate of about 1,000-per-day, taking their experiences and their wisdom from our ken. Make SURE you and your families assemble an oral history of their experiences before it's all gone for good.

And to my fellow veterans, I would add: "It's OK that they don't always remember us. We got what we wanted...a free country."

Musings on a new rifle rack

Let me be clear ... there was absolutely NO blank spot on my office wall crying out for more clutter. Shifting things around on the wall to make room was tantamount to a sheriff's eviction of some poor squatter (on my wall, mind you, not necessarily in my office) in order to make room for the new rack. (That's RIFLE rack! Get your minds out of the gutter!)

But the wall wanted a rifle rack. Everytime I glanced over at my Geoff Hunt Napoleonic Navy prints, with row upon row of US Navy coffee mugs displayed below them, I saw in my mind five or six stacked, gleaming, metal-wood-and-plastic beauties in their place.

Mind you, there was nothing wrong with the rifles' previous storage. Kathy and I built an "armory" when we first moved in here, that would provide all the firearms a safe, dry storage area, standing (locked!) in their transport cases.

Gun owners will understand, tho. Fully HALF the joy of owning a quality firearm is just GAZING at the darned thing -- polished and lethal-looking -- in a place of pride where you and the rest of the world can see it.

Even though I've read the Aubrey/Maturin series of novels of the British Navy in the Napoleonic era 15 or 16 times, I never would look at the Hunt prints in my office and imagine myself aboard a square-rigged ship of the line. (For a modern sailor like myself, it always seems like WAAAY too much work, and some of the wormiest, lousiest food in the world.)

But like the fine pieces of machinery they are, fine rifles displayed on a wall (you should pardon the expression) "fire" the imagination.

Looking at the AR-15, I can almost feel the semi-anemic recoil, and hear the high-pitched "Clack" it makes as the bolt comes flying back. Looking at the M-14, I can almost feel the smooth, oiled action and hear the roar as it pounds rounds downrange. I can sense the weight of the darned thing, and the natural way it shoulders and fits itself to my hands. Looking WAAAY up at the 1943 Mosin/Nagant on the top rack, my shoulder twinges at the thought of firing the beast in the spring ... and I can't wait to feel the ache in my shoulder from a full day at the range with it. (Provided some historian can unearth some ammo for it.) Looking at the thorougly modern Steyr's blunt muzzle, I am reminded that the Assault Weapons Ban has finally expired, and that it now would be legal to put a genuine flash hider of muzzle brake on this rifle. (The current blank barrel just looks so ... abrupt. I mean, this rifle wants a HAT!)

So one of the Geoff Hunt prints came down, and a homemade rack went up on the wall, perched right over my red rolling tool cabinet/camera storage unit.

Some pounding and cursing later, the rifles now adorn my office wall: Mosin/Nagant M91/30; Springfield Armory M-1A (the civilian version of the veteran M-14); DPMS AR-15 carbine; Steyr USR rifle; and the Fabrique Nationale PS-90.

Looking at the rifles now, I have discovered that (RATS!) some rifles just don't sit well with others.

The top two, all fine oak, mahoghany and blued steel, are just classic and timeless. Holding them, one can almost smell smoke from campfires and battlefields around the world.

But the other three look like something from Star Wars: all swept back fiberglass and scoped steel. Perched under the older models, they almost look WRONG!

(Sigh)

Well, they're just going to have to learn from their diversity, 'cause there's way too much clutter on my office walls to fit another rifle rack. (Although, maybe the Hunt prints all want to go into storage awhile. Hmmmmm)

Murphy's Laws of Combat

Young Mr. Murphy was a practical man... one's of the world's foremost pragmatists. He was the first to codify the difference between what military people are told ... and what really awaits them in the world.

It's kind of the military version of "The Biggest Lies in the World," (The check is in the mail,) and(Yes, of COURSE I'll respect you in the morning...)

I've been compiling Mr. Murphy's real-world laws of combat and here they are:

1. Friendly fire - isn't.

2. Suppressive fires – won’t.

3. Recoilles rifles – aren’t.

4. Try to look unimportant; the enemy may be low on ammo.

5. Don't look conspicuous; it draws fire

6. Don’t draw fire; it irritates everyone around you.

7. You are not Superman; Marines and fighter pilots take note.

7. A sucking chest wound is Nature's way of telling you to slow down.

8. If it's stupid but it works, it isn't stupid.

9. If at first you don't succeed, call in an airstrike.

10. If you are forward of your position, your artillery will fall short.

11. Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than yourself.

12. Never go to bed with anyone crazier than yourself.

13. Never forget that your weapon was made by the lowest bidder.

14. If your attack is going well, you're walking into an enemy ambush.

15. The enemy diversion you're ignoring is their main attack.

16. The enemy always attacks on two occasions: when they're ready. & when you're not.

17. No OPLAN ever survives initial contact with the enemy.

18. There is no such thing as a perfect plan.

19. Five-second fuses always burn down in three seconds.

20. There is no such thing as an atheist in a foxhole.

21. A retreating enemy is probably just falling back and regrouping.

21. The important things are always simple; the simple are always hard.

22. The easy way is always mined.

23. Teamwork is essential; it gives the enemy other people to shoot at.

24. If you are short of everything but the enemy, you are in the combat zone.

25. When you have secured the area, make sure the enemy knows it too.

26. Incoming fire has the right of way.

27. No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection.

28. No inspection-ready unit has ever passed combat.

29. If the enemy is within range, so are you.

30. The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.

31. Things which must be shipped together as a set, aren't.

32. Things that must work together, can't be carried to the field that way.

33. Radios will fail as soon as you need fire support.

34. Radar tends to fail at night and in bad weather, and especially during both.

35. Anything you do can get you killed, including doing nothing.

36. Make it too tough for the enemy to get in, and you can’t get out.

37. Tracers work both ways.

38. If you take more than your fair share of objectives, you will get more than your fair share of objectives to take.

39. When both sides are convinced they're about to lose, they're both right.

40. Professional soldiers are predictable; but the world is full of dangerous amateurs.

41. Military Intelligence is a contradiction.

42. Fortify your front; you'll get your rear shot up.

43. Weather ain't neutral.

44. If you can't remember, your Claymores are probably pointed towards you.

45. Air defense motto: shoot 'em down; sort 'em out on the ground.

46. 'Flies high, it dies; low and slow, it'll go.

47. The Cavalry doesn't always come to the rescue.

48. Napalm is an area support weapon.

49. Mines are equal-opportunity weapons.

50. B-52s and battleships are the ultimate close support weapons.

51. Sniper's motto: reach out and touch someone.

52. Killing for peace is like screwing for virginity.

53. The one item you need is always in short supply.

54. Interchangeable parts aren't.

55. It's not the bullet with your name on it; it's the one addressed "to whom it may concern" you've got to think about.

56. When in doubt, empty your magazine.

57. The side with the simplest uniforms wins.

58. Combat will occur on the ground between two adjoining maps.

59. No matter what the supply specialist tells you, you will NOT receive it when you get in-country!

60. Murphy was a grunt.

If you've ever owned an AK-47, an AR-15 or a Mosin/Nagant, you'll understand

They say that after awhile, dogs and dog owners begin to look alike. I believe that you can extend that dictum to firearms owners. Not that we begin to look like our firearms, mind you, but that we begin to have shared experiences with other owners/sufferers of the same weaponry.

For instance, most of us who own a semi-automatic AK know it's legendary for being so loosely constructed it rattles when you pick it up. By the same token, all of us who own an AR-15 (the civilian equivalent of the M-16) know it's so tightly constructed it comes with its own toothbrush to keep dirt and grit from fouling it. (True!) And those of us who own a Mosin/Nagant M1930 (mine has Soviet markings and was issued in 1943) can't believe soldiers actually had to MARCH while carrying this behemoth!!!

I found this list of other common firearms characteristics on the Internet, and reblog it here.

A Comparison of the AK-47, AR-15 and Mosin/Nagant M1930:

AK – It works though you have never cleaned it, ever.
AR – You have $9-per-ounce special non-detergent synthetic Teflon-infused cleaner
MG – It was last cleaned in Berlin in 1945

AK – You are able to hit the broad side of a barn from the inside
AR – You are able to hit the broad side of a barn from 600 meters
MG – You can hit the farm from two counties away

AR – Cheap magazines are fun to buy
AR – Cheap magazines melt
MG – What’s a magazine?

AK – Your safety can be heard as you click it off from 300 meters away
AR – You can silently flip off the safety with your finger on the trigger
MG – What’s a safety?

AK – Your rifle comes with a cheap nylon sling
AR – Your rifle comes with a 9-point stealth tactical suspension system
MG – Your rifle has dog collars (It really does!)

AK – Your bayonet makes a good wire cutter
AR – Your bayonet is actually a pretty good steak knife
MG – Your bayonet is longer than your leg

AK – You can put a .30” hole through 12” of oak
AR – You can put one hole in a paper target with 30 rounds at 100 meters
MG – You can knock down everyone else’s target with the shock wave of your bullet’s passage

AK – When out of ammo, your rifle will substitute as a club
AR – When out of ammo, your rifle will substitute as a wiffle ball bat
MG – When out of ammo, your rifle will make a supreme lance, tent pole, oar, pike or firewood

AK – Recoil is manageable, even fun
AR – What’s recoil?
MG – Recoil is used to reset your shoulder after it was dislocated by the previous shot

AK – Your sight adjustment goes to 10, and you’ve never bothered moving it
AR – Your sight adjustment is incremented in fractions of a minute of angle
MG – Your sight adjustment goes out to 12 miles, and you’ve actually tried it

AK – Your rifle can be used by any two-bit nation’s illiterate conscripts to fight elite forces everywhere
AR – Your rifle is used by elite forces everywhere to fight two-bit nations’ illiterate conscripts
MG – Your rifle has fought against itself, and won every time

AK – Your rifle won some revolutions
AR – Your rifle drove Saddam out of Kuwait
MG – Your rifle won a pole vault event

AK – You paid $350
AR – You paid $900
MG – You paid $89.95 (I actually did!)

AK – You buy cheap ammo by the case
AR – You lovingly reload precision crafted rounds, one-by-one
MG – You dug your ammo out of a farmer’s field in the Ukraine, and it works just fine

AK – You can intimidate your foe when you fix bayonets
AR – Your foes laugh themselves to death when you fix bayonet
MG – You can bayonet your foe on the other side of the river without leaving your foxhole

AK – Service life, 60 years
AR – Service life, 40 years
MG – Service life, 100 years and counting

AK – It’s easier to buy a new rifle when you want to change cartridge sizes
AR – You can change cartridge sizes with the push of two pins and a new upper receiver
MG – You would never risk ridicule by suggesting there IS any other cartridge but 7.62mm x 54r

AK – You can repair your rifle with a hammer and a swift kick
AR – You can repair your rifle by taking it to a certified gunsmith (It’s under warranty!)
MG – You either take it to a blacksmith, or buy a new one

AK – You consider it a badge of honor when the rifle handguards burst into flames
AR – You consider it a badge of honor when you shoot a sub-MOA 5-shot group
MG – You consider it a badge of honor when you cycle five rounds without using a 2x4 as a lever

AK – After a long day at the range, you relax by watching “Red Dawn”
AR – After a long day at the range, you relax by watching “Black Hawk Down”
MG – After a long day at the range, you relax with a visit to the chiropractor

AK – You can accessorize your rifle with a muzzle brake or a new stock
AR – You can accessorize your rifle with stuff that is 8 times more expensive than the rifle
MG – Your rifle’s main accessory is a small tin can with a funny lid, buried under a building in Kiev

AK – Your rifle’s finish is varnish and paint
AR – Your rifle’s finish is Teflon and high-tech polymers
MG – Your rifle’s finish is low-grade shellac, cosmoline and some woman named Olga’s toenail polish

AK – Your wife tolerates your signed photo of Mikhail Kalashnikov
AR – Your wife tolerates your signed photo of Eugene Stoner
MG – You’re not sure there WERE cameras around to photograph Sergei Mosin

AK – Late at night, you have the urge to hold your rifle over your head and shout “Wolverines!”
AR – Late at night, you have the urge to clear your house, from room-to-room
MG – Late at night, you have the urge to dig a fighting trench in the front yard and sleep in it.

Holding history-unearthing a firearm artifact

As it came out of its box, it had all the grace and beauty of a railroad tie.

My 1943 Soviet-era Mosin Nagant M1930 rifle was covered in 67 years worth of cosmoline and crud. The laquered finish of the stock was cracked and darkened from age (and more cosmoline), like those ancient painted icons you see in old Eastern Orthodox churches. When I first beheld it in its box, it had all the polish of a burnt meatloaf ... and a dirty one at that. (Hey, what did I expect for a whopping $89.95 cash money?) The first time I touched it, my fingers stuck to the stock. (ewww)

But I nevertheless was holding my breath when I finally took it out of the box. In my hands was history. I held a historic artifact, much as an archaeologist might find in some dusty Middle Eastern dig site.

(OK ... that was a little over the top. Few Middle Eastern archaeologists ever unearthed a Mosin Nagant firearm ... or ANYTHING more advanced than a Bronze Age spear point... but you catch my drift.) Somewhere under the grime was a thing of lethal beauty. Like an archaeologist, I was going to have to be patient and use the firearms equivalent of a camel's hair brush to whisk away the decades of disuse and muck.

But I was frankly stumped. There wasn't a clean spot on the thing. How in the hell do you clean something that has been immersed in sticky axle grease and grime for more than half a century?

A few days research on the Internet showed I had several options:
1. Move to Texas, and hang the rifle in the sun for a few days. (Cosmoline melts at a mere 135 degrees and the Southwestern sun easily can heat things up that much. However, since I don't speak Texan, this was not my preferred option.)
2. Take everything apart and put it in the oven to bake at the lowest setting. (Since most chat rooms caution that this makes the whole house stink of petroleum, this also didn't make the cut.)
3. Take everything apart, and run it through the dishwasher. (Again, the Internet chat rooms caution that the melted cosmoline tends to run down household pipes only for about five feet before congealing again, this ALSO wasn't a great option.)
4. Take everything apart, and place all the parts in a galvanized garbage can. Into the can, place several work lights, which will heat everything up and melt the cosmoline. (My condo is already small, and I'm supposed to find somewhere to place a galvanized garbage can ... and start heating it up???? Fail!)

On the fifth day of searching the net, I found one mention of a guy who borrowed his wife's clothes steamer, and steamed the cosmoline and gunk out. I began searching Kathy's closets and storage for a clothes steamer. But my darling wife had other plans. She went to a charity rummage sale and bought me a used shop steam gun for $2 (cash money). I was HAPPY!!! I sat down outside and, armed with a hammer, a screwdriver and a pocket knife, disassembled my still-gunky rifle. I set to work with the steamer.

Twenty minutes later a rifle began appearing beneath the layers of yuck and grime.

Directing the steam stream onto the grease-soaked stock, the cosmoline yellowed, melted and dropped off in huge globs into the aluminum pan below. Steaming the bolt soon rewarded me with a gleaming, tool-steel bolt whose armorer's bow-and-arrow markings shone afresh.

I chanced to glance down the bore of the barrel. I winced and wished I hadn't. Where normally one expects to find the ever-graceful spiral grooves glinting in the light of reflected sun, this rifle bore was solid black. (Gulp!)

I got hardcore. I stuck the steam nozzle into the breach, pulled the trigger and let fly. Huge black globs of slime dripped from the muzzle, along with wisps of steam. Soon the globs disappeared, and the rifle barrel was blowing steam like Vesuvius just about to erupt.

An hour later, it was done. My Soviet beauty shone in the sunlight, a thing reborn.

All reassembled, it was as tall as I am. The pike bayonet made it as tall as most tent poles. You could pole vault with this thing. But it's friggin' gorgeous.

The armorer's marks show it was made in 1943 at the Ishvesk arsenal, and proof tested for accuracy. (Something I intend upon doing myself as soon as I can unearth some 7.62mm x 54r ammo for it.)

Maybe some archaeologist will unearth some at his dig site.

Zen in the art of Firearms Maintenance

Beautiful, warm Fall day. I move outside to become one with the universe, one with my gorgeous, beautiful,(fouled, problematic, pissing-me-off)Springfield Armory M-1A rifle. Since I've owned it, I've never managed to field strip it further than removing the barrel and trigger group.
This is the day! A beautiful day. This is the day my rifle-cleaning-karma changes, I'm sure.
I sit in the sun. I am warmed by the rays of the sun and bask in the glow of the cosmic muffin. I listen to the hum of bees. I find my center. I am one with the world, with this beautiful rifle. Ommmmmmm.
I lift out the trigger group. Ommmmmmmm.
I lift out the barrel and receiver group. Ommmmmmm.
I am one with the universe. Nothing can vex me. Nothing can stop me. The universe will unfold as it should and the operating rod will lift out when I pull it back to the appropriate notch.
Ommmmmmmmmm.
[Ahem] I say again my last, "The universe will unfold as it should and the operating rod will lift out when I pull it back to the appropriate notch."
Umm ... are you listening universe? I HAVE PULLED THE OPERATING ROD BACK TO THE NOTCH(shouting at the universe now, causing some neighbors to wonder what's going on behind my front yard fence)
Shit.
Oh. Umm. Ommmmmmmm.
[Heavy sigh]
I give up again, and decide to simply run a bore brush down the barrel, and swab the chamber as best I can.
Having made that decision, I find my Zen again ... Ommmmmmm
No I haven't! Goddam, piss-me-off rifle!
Should have stuck to archery

Zen Teachings

1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me for the path is narrow.. In fact, just p*ss off and leave me alone.

2. Sex is like air. It's not that important unless you aren't getting any.

3. No one is listening until you fart.

4. Always remember you're unique. Just like everyone else.

5. Never test the depth of the water with both feet..

6. If you think nobody cares whether you're alive or dead, try missing a couple of mortgage payments.

7. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

8.. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

9. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

10. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably well worth it.

11. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

12. Some days you are the dog, some days you are the fire hydrant.

13. Don't worry; it only seems kinky the first time.

14. Good judgment comes from bad experience ... and most of that comes from bad judgment...but it can make for some great memories.

15. A closed mouth gathers no foot.

16. There are two excellent theories for arguing with women. Neither one works.

17. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips are moving.

18. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

19. We are born naked, wet and hungry, and get slapped on our arse .... then things just keep getting worse.

20. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

Vox Populi, vox Dei. (Latin for, "My God, who dealt this mess?")

As the President is wont to say, "Let me be crystal clear ..." (Now that I think of it, the idea of a Chicago politician being crystal clear on anything is so mind-numbing as to be beyond human ken,)
But I digress.
I want to be clear ...I am no Tea Party Person. Never much of a joiner, to begin with (except for that whole, 37-year Navy thing, that is.)
I hold no political truck with blowhards of either political extreme, whether Pachyderm or Burro. I hold the Rush Limbaughs of the world in as much distaste as I do the Al Frankens.
Frankly, I was heart-sick when a US Congressman of my (Republican) party, and a former Navy pilot at that, was sent to prison for graft a few years ago. But I am JUST as sickened at a US (Democrat) congressman from down south getting sent to jail when he was caught keeping graft money in his office refrigerator.
But maybe one ... just one ... of the Tea Party's battle cries this year has caught my attention and is taking hold.
"Vote the Bums Out!"
As much as navigating the darker corners of Washington is a learned skill-set, mayhap there's something to be said for starting afresh, and getting a whole new bunch of rascals into Congress this year. Maybe if we do that, we'll have at least a few years of Congress representing US ... the people that put them in office ... before they metamorphose into the usual collection of political scoundrels and circus clowns.
So, on Primary and on election day, consider voting the bums ... ALL OF THEM ... out of office and starting anew.

Gen. McChrystal Takes One for the Team

The Commander in Chief cites a lack of forethought in Army Gen. Stan McChrystal's recent interview in Rolling Stone magazine. In that piece, the Gen -- one whom Pres Obama had praised to the skies a mere matter of months earlier -- had aired differences between his plans to prosecute the ongoing war and the President's foreign policy.

Lack of forethought? HAH! I believe Gen. McChrystal knew EXACTLY what he was doing.

A couple of years ago, the previous Commander of US Central Command, Navy Admiral William "Fox" Fallon, also fell on his sword publicly in an interview with Esquire magazine, in which he took the Bush administration to task for its saber-rattling talk of war with Iran. Fallon, a fighter-pilot-scholar-turned-diplomat, aired his own feelings about the tenstions between the Bush White House and Iran.

A short time later, he was unceremoniously canned from his post at CentCom.

And so now comes Gen. McChrystal ... feeling hemmed in by Obama political appointees and a foreign policy that ties the hands of US troops in Harm's Way.

Upon assuming command (at Obama's insistence) of all US troops in Afghanistan, the first thing the canny general ordered was a complete review of the US troop posture over there...resulting in a thick compendium of figures, which basically stated that without a 40,000-troop increase, the Afghanistan mission was doomed to failure ... and then allowed that report to be leaked to the media!

Simply put, Obama and his cronies were furious (and now under immense pressure to comply with McChrystal's report's recommendations.)

Now comes the Rolling Stone interview. McChrystal knew PRECISELY what a good, political general should do ... shut the hell up, toe the President's political line, and follow orders ... not to mention staying out of the media limelight.

But current policy now places as much or even more importance upon protecting civilian lives in Afghanistan, even to the point of endangering US troops during a firefight.

To Gen. McChrystal, a soldier's soldier, this was as unacceptible as it is untenable.

So the general did the only thing he could honorably do: He spoke up for his soldiers, sailors, airmen and Marines ... knowing that he would be required to sacrifice his own career as penance. Now, as a result, perhaps one of only two generals that could really FIGHT this war now is toast, and out of the fight.

And the East Coast liberal political Brahmans in the Obama Administration couldn't have cared less.

They only care that the President was politically embarassed, which is far more important that a few soldier's lives.

Staff Officers say the Darndest Things

To those of you who've never worn a uniform, and still think that Hell is a region somewhere below our reality, you have to realize that military people don't go there ... they go to unified commands for their sins.

The US Military divides up its world-wide responsibilities into unified, joint-service commands, each with its own set of unique or geographic responsibilities: European Command (EuCom in Military-speak,) Pacific Command (PaCom,) Central Command (CentCom,) Transportation Command (TransCom,) and the like. Each such command is headed up by a four-star general or admiral, each full to the brim with full Colonels and Navy Captains running their little fiefdoms, and each full of lesser beings (such as yours truly) slaving away in their trailer cubicles for the greater good.

Adding to the perpetual state of confusion is the fact that all five Armed Services are there, each speaking a different language, each wearing a different uniform, each wishing some of the others would just go away quietly.

Let me give you a personal example: In 2006, I reported to CentCom as Combat Camera Officer. I wound up working for an Army Colonel (an engineer and West Pointer,) and an Air Force Lt Colonel (another good guy.)

One one particular day, the Air Force LTC was giving me a set of instructions. I was still new to the Joint Staff business, and wanted to impress him with my eagerness.

"Aye, aye, Sir!" I responded.
"What the heck was that?" the Lt Col asked?
"Sir, that's Navy-speak for 'I understand my orders and I will obey,'" I explained.
"Oh, well in the Air Force, we just say, 'That's cool!'"

It is from this baffling joint-service scene that the following list of Staff Officer Quotes is compiled:
--------------------------------------------------
"That was a typo. Instead of 'pot of money,' it should have read 'pot money.' It refers to money spent by OSD after smoking a joint. We have a similar fund we can tap into for financing many of our own ideas. In fact, that's how we got the name 'Joint Staff.'"

LTC (Joint Staff) in an email describing the amount of money available for use on a given project
"I finally figured out that when a Turkish officer tells you, "It's no problem," he means, for him."

Maj (EUCOM, European Command, which is in charge of American operations in Europe)
"Never in the history of the US Armed Forces have so many done so much for so few..." MAJ (Task Force Warrior) on the "success" of the Free Iraqi Forces (FIF) Training Program, where 1100 Army troops trained 77 Iraqi exiles at the cost of, well, way too much...

"Our days are spent trying to get some poor, unsuspecting third world country to pony up to spending a year in a sweltering desert, full of pissed off Arabs who would rather shave the back of their legs with a cheese grater than submit to foreign occupation by a country for whom they have nothing but contempt." LTC (JS) on the joys of coalition building

"OSD (Office of the Secretary of Defense) will continue to drive this cart into the ground long after the wheels have been sold on E-bay." MAJ (JS) on the progress of FIF (Free Iraqi Forces)

"Please don't laugh. This is my job." Maj (EUCOM) from Protocol, explaining in great detail the approved procedures for dropping off VIPs

"I guess the next thing they'll ask for is 300 US citizens with Hungarian last names to send to Iraq..." MAJ (JS) on the often-frustrating process of building the Iraqi coalition for Phase IV

"If we wait until the last minute to do it, it'll only take a minute." MAJ (EUCOM)

"The only reason that anything ever gets done is because there are pockets of competence in every command. The key is to find them...and then exploit the hell out of 'em." CDR (CENTCOM, Central Command, which is in charge operations in Iraq and Afghanistan))

"Working with Hungary is like watching a bad comedy set on auto repeat..." LCDR (EUCOM)

"Between us girls, would it help to clarify the issue if you knew that Hungary is land-locked?" CDR to MAJ (EUCOM) on why a deployment from Hungary is likely to proceed by air vice sea

"We are condemned men who are chained and will row in place until we rot." LtCol (CENTCOM) on life at his Command

"Right now we're pretty much the ham in a bad ham sandwich..." GO/FO (EUCOM)

"So, what do you wanna do?"...
"I dunno, what do YOU wanna do?"...
"I dunno, what do YOU wanna do?," etc. COL (DIA) describing the way OUSD(S) (Undersecretary of Defense for Strategy) develops and implements their strategies

"Let's face it: Africa sucks..." DOS representative (Bureau of African Affairs) at a conference on Africa

"One of the secrets to maintaining my positive attitude in this job is this: I complete no tasker before its time..." MAJ (EUCOM)

"It is nothing for US soldiers to be in the desert for a year without a woman. It is different for us, though, because we are Latin..." LTC (LATAM country) on one of the differences between Latin American soldiers and their US counterparts

"I'll be right back. I have to go pound my nuts flat..." Lt Col (EUCOM) after being assigned a difficult tasker

"I guess this is the wrong power cord for the computer, huh?" LtCol (EUCOM) after the smoke cleared from plugging his 110V computer into a 220V outlet

"OK, this is too stupid for words." LTC (JS)

"When you get right up to the line that you're not supposed to cross, the only person in front of you will be me!" CDR (CENTCOM) on his view of the value of being politically correct in today's military

"There's nothing wrong with crossing that line a little bit, it's jumping over it buck naked that will probably get you in trouble..." Lt Col (EUCOM) responding to the above

"I may be slow, but I do poor work..." MAJ (USAREUR)

"Great! What we really need are some more 0-5s (Lieutenant Colonel) around here..." MAJ (EUCOM) on the release of the list of 0-5 promotables

"Don't ever be the first...don't ever be the last...and don't ever volunteer to do anything...." CDR (EUCOM) relating an ancient Navy truism

"Hey, somebody should really do that..." CDR (CENTCOM) on the CENTCOM tasking process

"Are you sure they aren't writing about us? Hell, at least we should jump on that wholesale desertion thing..." Maj (CENTCOM) on the following report from a newspaper:
"(The Iraqi military was crippled by)...a multitude of erratic orders and strategic miscalculations, while its fighting units barely communicated with one another and were paralyzed from a lack of direction...these woes were compounded by incompetence, poor preparation, craven leadership and (the) wholesale desertions of thousands of soldiers..."

"Cynicism is the smoke that rises from the ashes of burned out dreams." Maj (CENTCOM) on the daily thrashings delivered to AOs (Action Officers) at his Command

"WE are the reason that Rumsfeld hates us..." LTC (EUCOM) doing some standard, Army self-flagellation

"South of the Alps and East of the Adriatic, paranoia is considered mental equilibrium..."

"The chance of success in these talks is the same as the number of "R's" in "fat chance..."" GS-15 (SHAPE)

"His knowledge on that topic is only power point deep..." MAJ (JS)

"We have no position on that issue. In fact, your position IS our position. Could you tell us what our position is?" CDR (TRANSCOM, Transportation Command) at a policy SVTC (Secure Video Teleconference)

"Ya know, in this Command, if the world were supposed to end tomorrow, it would still happen behind schedule." CWO4 (Chief Warrant Officer) (ret) (EUCOM)

"Even if Al-Qaeda nuked this place, the Chief of Staff would approve a 4-star visitor the very next day!" GS-12 (US government employee, grade 12) (EUCOM)

"Never pet a burning dog." LTC (Tennessee National Guard)

"It's basically announcing to the world that I've completely given up." LT (USN F-14 squadron) on his initial feelings behind the wheel of his brand new minivan

"A staff action is like getting an out of state check, countersigned by a fraud on a phony ID: some of the time it clears, but most of the time, you're screwed." Lt Col (USAF)

"I need intelligence, not information." Maj (EUCOM)

"Ah, the joys of Paris: a unique chance to swill warm wine and be mesmerized by the dank ambrosia of unkempt armpits..." LCDR (NAVEUR)

"'Status quo,' as you know, is Latin for 'the mess we're in...'" Attributed to former President Ronald Reagan

"We are now past the good idea cutoff point..." MAJ (JS) on the fact that somebody always tries to "fine tune" a COA with more "good ideas"

"Who are you talking to? ...Hang up the phone!" Lt Col mentoring MAJ (EUCOM) on how to stay in his own lane...

"The hardest thing about having a third child is switching from 1-on-1 to a zone defense." MAJ (EUCOM)

"Nobody ever said you had to be smart to make 0-6 (Colonel)." Col (EUCOM) "I haven't complied with a darn thing and nothing bad has happened to me yet."

"Whatever happened to good old-fashioned military leadership? Just task the first two people you see."

"The first question I ask myself when tasked to do something that's not obviously and overwhelmingly in my own best interest is, 'Exactly what happens if I don't do it?'"

"Accuracy and attention to detail take a certain amount of time." "No need to tip our hand as to how responsive we can be." CDR (EUCOM) in a passdown to his replacement

"I seem to be rapidly approaching the apex of my mediocre career." MAJ (JS)

"I think that my next set of orders will take me to Iraq. My career's going so badly that I'm considered a 'dead-ender.'" LtCol (EUCOM)

"I just realized that this War on Terror might take a little longer than we thought, so I am developing a new system of hanging charts on walls to solve our problem and win the war." LTC (EUCOM) after a review of long range Counter Terrorism (CT) plans

"Much work remains to be done before we can announce our total failure to make any progress."
"None of us is as dumb as all of us." Excerpted from a brief (EUCOM)

"Things are looking up for us here. In fact, Papua-New Guinea is thinking of offering two platoons: one of Infantry (headhunters) and one of engineers (hut builders). They want to eat any Iraqis they kill. We've got no issues with that, but State is being anal about it." LTC (JS) on OIF coalition-building

"It's not a lot of work unless you have to do it." LTC (EUCOM)

"I'm gonna have to leave work early today and probably stay home tomorrow. I'm fighting off a cold and I want to beat it before I start my leave in two days." MAJ (EUCOM)

"Creating smoking holes gives our lives meaning and enhances our manliness." LTC (EUCOM) at a CT conference

"Interagency is a process, not a noun." Anonymous (EUCOM)

"Eventually, we have to 'make nice' with the French, although, since I'm new in my job, I have every expectation that I'll be contradicted." DOS (Department of State) rep at a Counter Terrorism Conference

"Everyone should have an equal chance, but not everyone is equal."

"I am so far down the food chain that I've got plankton bites on my butt."

"You can get drunk enough to do most anything, but you have to realize going in that there are some things that, once you sober up and realize what you have done, will lead you to either grab a 12-gauge or stay drunk for the rest of your life."

"Once you accept that a dog is a dog, you can't get upset when it barks." Lt Col (USSOCOM), excerpts

"That guy just won't take 'yes' for an answer." MAJ (EUCOM)

"Let's just call Lessons Learned what they really are: institutionalized scab picking."

"I can describe what it feels like being a Staff Officer in two words: distilled pain." CDR (NAVEUR)

"When all else fails, simply revel in the absurdity of it all." LCDR (CENTCOM)

"Never attribute to malice that which can be ascribed to sheer stupidity." LTC (CENTCOM)

"They also serve, who sit and surf the NIPR (the Department of Defense's private internet)." CPT (CENTCOM)

"I hear so much about Ft. Bragg. Where is it?" "It's in the western part of southeastern North Carolina." LCDR and CPT (EUCOM)

"I've become the master of nodding my head and acting like I give a sh!t, and then instantly forgetting what the hell a person was saying the moment they walk away." Flag-level Executive Assistant

"Mark my words, this internet thing is gonna catch on someday." LTC (EUCOM)

"You're not a loser. You're just not my kind of winner..." GS-14 (OSD)

"He who strives for the minimum rarely attains it." GS-12 (DOS)

"I'm tired of waiting on somebody who I know is just going to ignore me once they arrive." Lt Col (EUCOM), while waiting to start a brief for a visiting VIP

"If I'd had more time, I'da written a shorter brief..." Derived from the writings of Mark Twain

"Vision without funding is hallucination." Maj (EUCOM)

"I work at EUCOM. I know bullsh!t when I see it." LTC (EUCOM) in a game of office poker

"You only know as much as you don't know." GO (EUCOM)

"I'm just livin' the dream..." EUCOM staffer response to the question, "How's it going?" or, "What are you doing?"

"I'm just ranting...I have nothing useful to say." LTC (EUCOM)

"Why would an enemy want to bomb this place and end all the confusion?" GS-14 (EUCOM)

"How soon before we can give this guy a medal, a good OER, and send him on his way?" GS-12 (EUCOM) referring to his boss

"Other than the fact that there's no beer, an early curfew and women that wear face coverings for a reason, Kabul is really a wonderful place to visit." LTC (CENTCOM)

"It was seen, visually." LTC (EUCOM) during a Reconnaissance briefing

"Let me tell you about the benefits of being on a staff..."
"This should be a short conversation."
LtCol to Lt Col (EUCOM)

"If you want to take down a country, gimme a call. We'll get it done." GO/FO (EUCOM) to a gathering of US Ambassadors

"Hello gentlemen. Are we in today or are you just ignoring my request?" GS-15 (DSCA) in an email to EUCOM staffers

"After seeing the way this place works, I bet that Mickey Mouse wears a EUCOM watch." Maj (EUCOM)

"Your Key Issues are so 2003..." CPT (CJTF-180) in January 2004

"USCENTCOM commanders announced today that they intend to maintain their presence in Qatar "until the sun runs out of hydrogen," thus committing the US to the longest duration deployment in human history. When asked how they planned to maintain the presence in Qatar for a projected length of 4 to 5 billion years, planners said "we're working on a plan for that. We don't have one yet, but not having a plan or an intelligent reason to do something has never been much of an impediment for us in the past; we don't foresee it being a big show stopper for us in the future either." Among the options that were being discussed was an innovative program to "interbreed" the deployed personnel. "We are going to actively encourage the military members in Qatar to intermarry and raise children that will replace them in the future. Sure, it may be a little hard on some of our female service members, since there currently are about 8 men for every woman over there, but we expect that to be OBE as the sex ratios will even out in a
generation or two. In any case the key to the plan is to make these assignments not only permanent, but inheritable and hereditary. For example, if you currently work the JOC weather desk, so will your children, and their children, and their children, ad infinitum. We like to think of it as job security." CPT (CJTF-180)

"That's FUBIJAR." COL (CENTCOM) (Fu--ed Up, But I'm Just a Reservist... )

"As far as I'm concerned, I'm the only one that matters in here." COL (CENTCOM)

"No matter how hard this Command beats me down, I am still able to get it up." Maj (EUCOM)

"I keep myself confused on purpose, just in case I am captured and fall into enemy hands!" GO/FO (CENTCOM)

"Cheese-dickery abounds at this Command." LtCol (EUCOM)

"Does anybody around here remember if I did anything this year?" LTC (EUCOM) preparing his Officer Evaluation Report support form

"This is all happening because we had the sympathetic detonation of a stress grenade." Maj (EUCOM) after an insignificant issue became a theater focus because somebody used the "Reply all" function

"I'd be happy to classify this document for you. Could you tell me its classification?" GS11 (EUCOM) in an email from the Foreign Disclosure office

"Nothing is too good for you guys...and that's exactly what you're gonna get..." LTC (EUCOM) describing the way Army policy is formulated

"The only thing that sucks worse than being me is being you..." LTC (EUCOM)

"Why should I worry? Nobody here outranks me by that much." MAJ (SOCEUR) briefing a group of 0-6s

"I have to know what I don't know..." Col (CENTCOM) during a shift changeover briefing

"No. Now I'm simply confused at a higher level..." Foreign GO/FO when asked if he had any questions following a transformation brief at JFCOM

"I'm planning on taking the weekend off...notionally..." LT (EUCOM) midway through a huge, simulated command exercise

"'Leaning forward' is really just the first phase of 'falling on your face.'" Col (MARFOREUR)

"I've heard of 'buzzwords' before but I have never experienced a 'buzz sentence' or a 'buzz paragraph' until today." Maj (EUCOM) after listening to a JFCOM trainer/mentor

"We've got to start collaborating between the collaboration systems." (Centcom)

"Our plan for the Olympics is to take all the ops and put it in the special room we have developed for ops." GO/FO (EUCOM)

"Did you hear that they're canning Bob Edwards on NPR?" "Why? Did they catch him standing up for the National Anthem or something??" COL to CDR (EUCOM)

"Not to be uncooperative, but we're just being uncooperative." CDR (EUCOM) in an email response to a request for information

"We're from the nuke shop, sir. We're the crazy aunt in the closet that nobody likes to talk about ..." LtCol to GO/FO (EUCOM) in briefings

"We the willing, led by the unknowing, are doing the impossible for the ungrateful. We have done so much for so long with so little, that we are now qualified to do anything with nothing." Anonymous, but classic...

"The 'L' in CENTCOM stands for leadership..."

"At this Command, we have written in large, black letters: DNR (Do Not Resuscitate) on the back of our security badges." Maj (CENTCOM)

"He cloaked himself in an impenetrable veneer of terminology." Lt Col (JFCOM) describing the JFCOM alpha male

"Transformation has long been the buzzword for those that are dispossessed, dispirited and disillusioned..." Chaplain (EUCOM), allegedly talking about the Disciples...

"There are more disconnects on this issue than CENTCOM has staff officers." GO/FO (EUCOM)

"Is that a Navy or a Marine admiral?" MAJ (EUCOM)

Are you worth our service and sacrifice?

"The two highest achievements of the human mind are the twin concepts of 'loyalty' and 'duty.' Whenever these twin concepts fall into disrepute---get out of there fast! You may possibly save yourself, but it is too late to save that society. It is doomed." Robert A. Heinlein, the Notebooks of Lazarus Long

When the Vietnam War ended, one of every two American households with children in it had a direct family connection to the United States Armed Forces. Someone in that family had, in the past generation or the present, written a blank check to the government and the people it represents, and made that check payable on moment's notice and with their lives.

Since that time, the number of our households with a tie to the military services now has dropped to less than one in 40.

At the same time, more than 75% of members of the United States Congress were military veterans. Now, that number has dwindled to less than 17 percent, and still declining.

What's my point?

Fewer and fewer of us are carrying the burden of freedom for more and more of us.

I was watching some customers at our store browsing the televisions and other electronic toys the other day. Many of them now are beginning to think about spending some disposable cash again. The topic most discussed was either (a) how hard it was to buy a Father's Day present for the Man Who Had Everything, or (b) whether the US had a chance in the World Cup soccer matches.

At the same time, the news that day had run a brief note on the deaths of American servicemen in Afghanistan. Seventeen young Americans had come to a violent end at the hands of Islamic extremists ... extremists, mind you, whose global websites are promising to do the same sorts of damage to US ... and yet most people have little or no emotional connection to the courage, service and sacrifice of those brave young soldiers, sailors, airmen and Marines.

The War is something "other" people do.

This diminishing connection has a couple of potentially far-reaching side effects.

As unpopular and unsuccessful as the Draft was, back in the early 1970s, it DID guarantee a fresh infusion of American cultural thought into the Armed Forces every few months. Most of our soldiers were really civilians at heart, and levened the culture of our military with their democratic thoughts and ideas.

However, since the end of the Draft, the military has become more and more politicized and culturally conservative. My father (a career Army officer) used to boast that neither he nore his brother career officers ever voted, so fearful were they of becoming part of a politicized military. Yet now, not only do we military people vote, we vote almost monolithically Republican and conservative.

And some career officers and NCOs are beginning to look down their noses at "...those nasty civilians..." a clear sign of a widening gap between the military culture and the population it is sworn to protect.

From the other side, I have spoken countless times to parents who have absolutely NO desire to see their children serve anything larger than a (hopefully) growing bank account. Service to society (in or out of uniform) may be fine for others, they feel, but their kid is too good for that.

School districts refuse to allow military recruiters access to students, but welcome university recruiters and even some corporate recruiters on career days. Many teachers feel military service is for "losers" who can't get into a college

Yet statistics show annually that only a small percentage of college freshman make it all the way through to graduation...clearly a sign that college isn't right for everyone. Yet a few years of military service, once though a valid path to adulthood and citizenship, is looked down upon by many academics.

So now I wonder if Heinlein was right. Are we too far gone in socialized selfishness as a nation to fight our way back to the spirit of volunteerism that made our country great? Is there never to be another Greatest Generation?

I have had the honor of serving with true heroes ... people who stepped up to the plate after 9/11 and said, in effect, "Send me, Sir ... I'll go." Their willingness to go in Harm's Way is something I treasure and place great hope in for our collective future.

I just hope we're worth it.

The past isn't just prologue. It's pretext

OK, SO I TOOK MY FIREARMS OVER TO THE CREDIT UNION YESTERDAY ... wanted to get a list of all the makes, models and serial numbers notarized. (You want proof of ownership? Take THAT Mr. Fancy Pants District Attorney!) The bank manager didn't think it'd be a great idea for me to bring all the guns into the credit union, so we agreed to do the list-checking and serial number accounting out in the parking lot.
(Jeez, heavily armed credit union member packing heavy into the bank lobby...why so sensitive Mr. Credit Union Manager?)
I wondered in advance if we should call the Milwaukee Police and let them know what we were going to be doing ... Nah, I thought ... why ask for trouble? He and I schlepped out into the parking lot, dropped the back of the truck, and started opening rifle and pistol cases.
"So tell me," I asked the manager, "Is this the weirdest request you've ever had from a credit union member?"
"I gotta' say it's in my top five," he answered.
"Do you think we should call the police and let them know," I asked him?
"Nah," he said, "why ask for trouble?"
As I opened one rifle case after another, pcked up the glistening firearm inside, racked open the slide, and then showed him the model and serial number, I glanced at the tall buildings all around us and wondered if anyone was watching us handle a bunch of firearms in the back of a pickup truck, and what it must have looked like.
"Hmmm," the old lady in her window must have wondered, "Why is that nice bank manager buying firearms from that disreputable-looking person with the pickup truck?"
(Did I mention that I was slightly disreputable-looking that day, and that I drive a fire engine red pickup? No? My bad.)
Nevertheless, the manager and I made it through all 15 firearms -- rifles and pistols both -- when it happend. A Milwaukee Police Dept squad car pulled up a few feet away from us and stopped.
The police officer sat behind the wheel, sending a text message of some sort. "God," I said, "He must be calling for backup. ... I better go over and talk to him." So I walked the short distance to the cop car and stood there. He continued to text message.
Finally, he glanced up at me and seemed surprised. He rolled down the window, and said, "Can I help you?" I replied, "Uh, no ... can I help you?" What do you mean?" he asked. "Don't you have some questions for us?" I offered. "Ahh, OK ... how's it going," he asked.
"Um, no ... I, uh, I mean, aren't you here because of us?" I stammered. "Nope, I just pulled over to send a text message," the cop replied. "Why, did you call for a police officer?" Then he saw the tailgate of my pickup truck, still laden with a shiny AR-15 carbine, with red dot scope and collapsible stock. He looked back at me, raised an eyebrow, waited for me to say something.
"Officer I can explain," I stammered. "I'll bet this is going to be good," the cop replied.
I hastened to explain that I was retired military, and that I was having all my firearms listed and the list notarized, to provide proof of ownership.
"Why not do that inside?" the cop asked. Then he shook his head. "On second thought, I can see that would have created some real consternation from the other people inside. Why ask for trouble?"
Bottom Line: the cop drove away laughing hysterically. The Credit Union manager, who had stood stoically throughout it all, later admitted he had been mentally kissing his banking career goodbye. "I thought we were soooo busted," he said.
"Is this something you're going to bring up at the next branch manager meeting?" I asked. He shook his head.
"No, who'd believe it?" he replied, adding, "But I AM going to tell my grandkids about it!"

Innocent until damned for lack of evidence?

Silly me, I had always assumed that we were innocent until proven otherwise. (What my not-so-sainted father had evidently neglected to tell me when he taught me that, was that one's innocence often depends upon whom is in control of the local government at the time.) So, OK ...thereupon hangs a tale:
While I was on deployment, my son's roomate went bonkers and broke into the weapons locker, grabbed a pistol, called the Milwaukee Police Department and swore he was going to hurt himself. Milwaukee's finest showed up, took afore-mentioned thoroughly bonkered roomate into detention, and then promptly (and properly, I might add,) confiscated the weapons, the ammunition, and even the broken weapons locker.
Is this a good time to mention the fact that I have no problem with any of this, so far?
My part in all this began when I came home from deployment, and had to petition the Milwaukee municipal government for return of my own firearms.
Did I mention the fact that I -- so far -- have no problem with any of this? Thought I had.
OK ... so I call the MPD, and am given a sheaf of papers to fill out, make quadrupicate copies of all of them, and am given a pre-printed list of everyone who needs to get a copy.
The list also demanded I provide proof of ownership. Hmmm....I said to myself, "Self? This could be a problem," as many of the receipts from the original firearms sales had gone astray over the years.
I called the BATF, who track ALL firearms purchases. Yes, they replied, they'd be happy to supply me with copies of the sales documents for all my firearms ... IF I happened to be a police officer.
"But it's the police who are demanding this proof," I said, flustered. "Well, then they'll have to write letters asking for our assistance." "Letters, in plural?" I asked. "Yes, they'll have to write one letter for each firearm," the BATF-type answered smugly.
So I called MPD again, and told them they'd have to request the documents. "That's not what we do here," the investigating officer replied. (Hear that noise in the background? That's the walls beginning to move in. Just imagine that scene in Star Wars when our heroes land in a starship trash compactor, and one of them spouts, "I've got a bad feeling about this.")
"I've got a bad feeling about this," I said to the detective.
Undeterred (well, mostly, anyway,) I wrote out long narratives describing each firearm and how it came into our family. N.B. a couple of those pieces have been in our family for decades ... certainly long before record-keeping was a requirement.
The day of the court hearing arrived, and so did I, making sure to wear my US Navy polo shirt (Hell, maybe they're patriotic! Hey, it could happen!) and a clean pair of khaki pants.
Fortunately, the magistrate who heard the case was sympathetic -- especially since no crime had ever been committed with the afore-mentioned firearms.
But the District Attorney hadn't had HIS turn yet. "Your honor, there is some question about legitimate ownership, here," he said. "Mr. Breyfogle has not submitted proof of ownership documents."
I explained that the DA or his police detectives could gain those documents anytime they wanted, but us Commoners had as little access to our OWN RECORDS as I currently had to my own firearms.
The magistrated snorted at that, nodding his head.
Bottom line: I squeaked by and was granted ownership of my own property. (It still took a court order and several weeks until the MPD grudgingly returned my property to me.)
I checked with a local gunshop owner, and he nodded. Nothing new there, he said. "The MPD is trying to get all guns off the streets and out of peoples' hands," he said. "They figure if they take yours, then that's a few less they have to pry out of someone's hands in the future."
Excuse me? Weren't there those guys in the powdered wigs and pantaloons, otherwise known as the Founding Fathers, who went to war against a superpower for the rights to life, liberty and PROPERTY? (Check it out ... that bit about "pursuit of happiness" was a later draft ... and no, I was NOT there to has it out with them.)

I need this like a growth, but here I am

I really need this like I need a brain tumor ... but you can only say so much on FaceBook...and God knows my family is sick of listening to me rant.
But I'm an aging ex-Sailor who refuses to "...surrender gracefully the things of thy youth ..." (Yeah, but that pontificating Persian wrote that when he was barely out of his 20s.) So while here, I promise to try and entertain, enlighten, embalm ... whatever. (I can lay claim to that last sequence ... I think it was Larry, Moe and Curly that first used in in public.) I'll talk about guns, government and the like when the spirit(s) move me, and whenever readers stir me up.